If only my spouse would change, then life would be better.
If only my parents would change, then life would be better.
If only my employees would change, then life would be better.
If only my children would change, then life would be better.
Please tell me I’m not the only one, but throughout my life, I have blamed others for the “suffering” in my life. I have, yes, complained a bit. And, in more ways than one, I have placed the spotlight (of who need to change) on others. All the while overlooking the fact that, well, I need to change in a lot of ways.
Dallas Willard was known for saying, “YOU have the life you want.” And this is so true.
Whether it be through the things you say, don’t say, allow and don’t allow, you are the common denominator of every relationship in your life. In today’s episode, we talk about taking ownership of your life. We specifically talk about inner change and transformation.
Jean-Marie Jobs is today’s feature guest. She is the CEO of Yellow Marker, an organizational consulting firm, and the CEO of GAP Community which puts together transformation workshops and events. She has been doing transformation work for over 20 years now, helping everyone from youth to moms to grandparents to Fortune 100 CEOs. Full with the insights that she has learned along the way, Jean-Marie gives us some practical tools and life-changing insights on inner transformation and change.
Self-discipline for the sake of SELF does not yield much except performance. Discipline for the sake of the OTHER can yield all kinds of fruit relationally.
3 Big Takeaways:
- You can’t change others, but you can change yourself. Change takes willingness. You have to be willing to look at how you have contributed to the situations, breakdowns and conflicts in your life. While you can’t control others, you have power over how you show up in the world and how you respond to others.
- You are Human. In this journey of transformation, you will mess up and even, from time to time, go back to cycles you had let go of. When that happens, remind yourself – “you are human.” Designify the misstep and get back on track, change is a moment by moment decision. Look forward. You have a new opportunity to make a new choice in the future.
- In order to have any kind of transformation, you need to have time, intensity and perseverance. We live in a culture that, generally speaking, has no time, likes what is comfortable and wants things fast. The reality is that, as Dallas Willard would say, change takes time, intensity and perserverance.
Some questions I ask:
- How did you get into transformation work?
- Why is it so hard to change? (23:16)
- How can we become aware of the cycles in our lives? (26:03)
Sneak Peak of More:
- Jean-Marie Jobs talks about the two most common cycles she has seen (27:47)
- The power of maintaining a learning mindset and listening (31:19)
- Where is God in the whole process and journey of change? (38:09)
- GapCommunity.com [Gap Community Website]
- Yellow-Marker.com [Yellow Marker, Jean-Marie Jobs Organizational Consulting Website]